Inner Monologues That Should Be Happening

Human A: 

Hey guys! You know what’s actually pretty misogynistic?

This ad we have with a woman on her knees in front of a man.

Yeah, better not run that.

Come to think of it, why do we have billboards eroticizing women and meat?

How fucking weird is that?

Yeah, let’s not do that anymore.

Human B:

Hey, hey! You know what I think I won’t do?

I don’t think I’ll ridicule this woman whose clothes were accidentally ripped off by a man on live television.

Is it in any way her fault? No!

Does she actually have anything to apologize about? NO!

But more importantly, why do I feel so inclined to attack her for this and so much less so the white man?

Human C:

Hey guys! How about this one?

Who am I to say women can’t vote, go to college, or own property?

Human D:

Oh yeah? Well who am I to ask a woman if she’s on her period?

Human E:

Or I? To refuse a woman a right to her own body?

Human F:

You know I think that I’ll pay all my employees the same amount of money for the same level of work, regardless of color or gender, because I mean, how nonsensically messed up would that be if I didn’t?

.

Human G:

And I don’t think I’ll dismiss female patients and diagnose her with ‘hysteria’ because what kind of medical practitioner would I be if I did?

Human H:

And I think I won’t vote for this racist, ignorant, misogynistic, xenophobic toupe-ed orange.

Human I:

And you know what? I know sexual assault is wrong so I won’t won’t vote for this rapist’s job promotion.

Human J:

And I know sexual assault is wrong so I won’t grab this woman by the pussy.

And I won’t build a wall to keep people of color out of my country.

And I won’t allow children to be separated from their families while seeking refuge.

And I won’t ban people of another color from traveling to my country.

And I won’t mock this man who is disabled for life.

And I won’t make weird sex jokes about my daughter.

Human K:

And I won’t promote gay conversion therapy.

Human L:

And I won’t appropriate black culture in my music video.

Human M:

And I won’t cast a white woman to play a character named Motoko Kusanagi.

Human N:

And I’ll decide that it’s wrong on every level in the universe to kidnap these people from there home, stuff them in a crowded, vermin-infested ship, and sell them into a life of slavery. I mean what kind of actual monster would do that?

Human O:

And I don’t think I’ll cut off the labia and clitoris of this 10-year-old girl.

Human P:

Ah. And I will not sell my daughter into a marriage.

Nor will I ever think of her as my property in any way.

Human Q:

I think I’ll teach my son that it’s good to be compassionate and empathetic;

And that violence against and the contempt of women does not turn him into a man.

Human R:

And I’ll tell my daughter that she does not need to change anything on her body to be beautiful.

And that her vagina is a biological marvel and is freaking awesome.

Human S:

I’ll tell them that beauty actually goes much deeper than that.

And that they don’t need validation from anyone to be as happy as they deserve.

I’ll tell them I did my best to change the world for them

But that they can do so much more than I ever could